A few months ago, I went on a Christian television talk show and was interviewed about the book, “Father Please Let Him Live.” The question was asked of me, “Why were you so focused on Josh living?” And you know, I struggled to answer it. There was an evident switch in my answers from spiritual to carnal that I was aware of as my lips stuttered to find words.
Ironically, a close friend of mine that I speak to daily about the Lord and study with, asked me a similar question within a few weeks of the tv interview – only worded differently. She said the Lord impressed it upon her heart to ask me, “Why do you want Josh to be healed?” This time, the answer within was different.
And as the Lord continues to unravel my carnal thinking and show me His hand in every single detail of my journey, another veil has been removed from my eyes – having to do with the tile of this book. I had so many “creative” ideas. And if you know me, you know that’s my cup of tea. After a few decades in marketing, trained by some of the best of the best, I am an idea person. But all those fancy titles didn’t work – the Lord gave me the title and I knew when He showed me “Father Please Let Him Live” that creativity had no place in this project – it had to be authentic to the language of the heart. “The Heart Cry” would be center stage of a testimony that only He can design. I did not know the fullness of my prayer that would become the title of this writing.
The Lord absolutely answered my prayer. Josh lived. However, it was not a carnal life that was saved or sustained – to live is a present and future state of existence that can only take place inside of the source of life itself – Jesus. If “life” was the essence of what we see with our earthly eyes, then life is nothing more than death. The evidence of that is our current reality – NOTHING that is born into this earth remains…. Whether the baby is taken before it leaves the womb or the vessel lives to see 100 years of age, it has a time-clock on it that is certain to expire. A crucial point of the power of the resurrection was in the demonstration of a time-clock defeated by God in His Son Jesus who was seen by over 500 people after the thing called death (carnal life) was exterminated…. demonstrating that this thing we’re doing temporarily is NOT life. Life is actually a person named Jesus.
So, my friend Angie asked me, “You realize that if Josh had been miraculously healed in an instant, you would have allowed him to be paraded around as an external miracle?” I wonder if she knows how powerful that question is on my heart… because not only is she right, but there’s minimal power in that demonstration of a “miracle” as demonstrated by Jesus. If external miracles (what the outward man can see with their own eyes) is THE POINT of God’s Hand in our lives here, then why did the Pharisees kill Jesus? And taking that a step further, why did they question everything He did in terms of the miracles they saw with their own eyes as being evidence of the power of GOD IN HIM? They saw the miracles… they admittedly witnessed amazing things as they proclaimed AS THEY crucified Him on the cross. But they still killed the Son of God… Even with all the mind-blowing miracles they witnessed, they couldn’t receive the sacrificial love of God in Jesus on the cross, inside of their hearts.
I have to cut this short but will write more on this later… but just a quick point in “Father Please Let Him Live” – my heart cry to God… “Living” was not the gift of another day or even another 40 years here on earth. Instead, living was the seed of LIFE planted into Josh… Jesus entering into Josh (the seed of the new creature – which is CHRIST inside).
I asked Josh a couple of days ago. Do you think God gave you this stroke? He said, “Absolutely He was present in ALL OF IT and at the least, God absolutely allowed it and has a big purpose in it.” He followed up with, “I don’t know what the purpose is yet, but I know it’s big.” The amazing thing about Josh’s response is that he has never read the word of God. He’s heard scriptures and he’s heard sermons that quite honestly teach the opposite of the answer that he gave to me. But the truth of his heart, came directly from his heart – not from something he’s read or heard from men.
I know God gave Josh divine knowledge when Josh was in the valley. I witnessed the presence of spiritual encounters that I couldn’t see or hear myself, but I know they were there. I know Josh spoke with angels and much has surfaced from those moments. I also believe Josh when he says he spoke with Jesus and his grandpa Harry. And it’s beautiful to me that Josh told me then, “I can’t tell you what was said to me. It’s not time.”… and he continues today in his “outward mind” to have limited recollection of those conversations. But something out of this world was taught to Josh’s heart.. something I can’t begin to wrap my thoughts around.. Yet, I see that the miracle of GOD, Jesus in us, is doing a work inside of my husband that is far beyond any miracle we could see or touch or witness with these limited carnal senses.
Thank you Lord that Josh lives (not externally and temporarily.. but internally and eternally).. by the only source of LIFE… Jesus Christ.