I’ve found there are two types of convictions in our desire to know the Lord. They oppose one another and one of the two is just simply not real. It’s a knock off and a counterfeit (just as Satan himself is a fraud that masquerades himself as an angel of light)…. just as the wolves are wearing sheeps clothing… the ways of mankind have crept into our reasoning as it relates to ways of the Lord.
A few nights ago the Lord showed me something of importance. I didn’t know why it was so important and I don’t know why I’ve not seen this clearly before. Most of us have heard the story of Jesus sending out the disciples two by two. There are some details that I’ve never really thought much about. And as I was reminded of this event, I kept hearing, “Imagine what they look like… Can you see them?”
In Luke it says the Lord told those that he was sending before him, “behold, I am sending you out as lambs in the midst of wolves. 4 Carry no moneybag, no knapsack, no sandals, and greet no one on the road.” There’s the visual I was led to seek deeper. Imagine it…. These men were sent out broke and poor (no money with them), no food with them, no bags – nothing in their hands. They were sent barefoot on their journey.
The very next morning, my daughter asked me to read over a paper that was due for her college English class. She was assigned to write a paper about the single moment in her life that has impacted her the most. As I reached page 3 of her writing, I could feel the hair on my arms standing up. It was a divine appointment with the Lord and a completion of what He was showing me with the description of the image of his disciples that He sent out. My daughter has been through a lot. She’s had her life shaped and molded through many trials at an early age, and this was the moment that impacted her the most of all the moments in her life thus far?
She writes: “Why would he lay hands and pray for me? I have everything I need and this man has nothing.” The encounter she speaks of happened two years ago. She was participating in a homeless simulation for a class project at AHS, in which they took this group of Juniors by bus to Waco, Texas, stripped them of all of their personal belongings and allowed them to keep only 3 items. One sock for example, was 1 item. Then they through them on the streets in downtown Waco as moneyless, half-dressed homeless kids. After 3 days of walking miles in the hot sun with nothing to eat or drink and sleeping on the cold ground without blankets, my daughter’s group encountered a homeless man that she will never forget. She told him the truth – that she’s not really homeless – that she lives a life with luxuries that we take for granted. She has a nice home and clothes. She has running water and plenty of food to eat. After explaining the situation to the man, he told her that he’d been homeless for over 20 years, and he seemed to pity her as he asked her if he could pray for her. He prayed for Jesus to be the guidance of her life and he prayed for her eternal soul. I can’t explain the impact that only she knows from this experience. I can’t fully understand how this man changed my daughter, as she wrote about in her paper. But I can say how amazing it is to read this paper of hers the morning after revelation of the condition of the disciples that Jesus sent out. I could see the connection. The disciples didn’t look like me. They looked like the homeless man that prayed over my daughter in the park.
Jesus said in Mathew to those who are selected to inherit the Kingdom of his Father, “For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in.” And in response these people didn’t know they had done ANYTHING for Jesus – which I interpret as, he appeared to them in ways they didn’t identify as him, or expect. And reading into this further, I see the disciples again. I see the homeless man that encountered my daughter. I see the irony of WHO carries the word of the Lord and how different these vessels look than what we might anticipate.
If only I could understand how truly backwards my way of thinking is… how truly opposite my carnal thoughts and expectations are to the ways of the Living God.
My daughter wrote a word in her paper to conclude her encounter with the homeless man….. CONVICTED. That man didn’t pray for her to have food to eat or clothes on her back. He didn’t pray for her to have an easy life or to be sheltered from trials and suffering. He prayed for her eternal soul… An alignment with the Will of God that is so simplistic, yet so difficult to grasp in our temporary state of foolish desire.
Lord thank you for sending a true disciple of your light to my child and giving her this milestone to always remember.